Let's Start at the Beginning!

Moms, have you ever had one of those moments where your child is taking a beautifully long nap, and your husband was home since it was the weekend, so you got a lot [enough] done for the day, and you just have a minute free?

BUT- then you spend the moment day dreaming about your baby or a special moment you had together, trying to commit it to your memory forever, instead of luxuriating in a bath or having a glass of wine or something just for you?

Well, I'm doing that right now, and I keep coming back to the day Baby A. was born. I love reading birth stories on other blogs, and I listened to a lot of podcasts about childbirth while I was pregnant to help me prepare.

I got lucky, ya'll. I had a relatively easy pregnancy, no real complications, and I was fortunate enough to take off of work just prior to delivering so I could relax a little. When we found out we were having a baby, I was surprised and nervous like anyone else. Then, when we found out we were having a boy instead of the girl we'd both expected, I felt out of my depth. I grew up with two sisters- what do I know about raising boys? I was planning on having a hell-raising feminist! (Don't worry- I will still be raising a feminist.)

My little peanut!

I remember a lot of other women telling me scary things about how hard childbirth and having a newborn would be; and listen, don't do that to anyone, you guys! Unless they ask you for a specific truth about how hard something could be, don't scare a pregnant lady, because they're already terrified! And I was scared, just like everyone else, but my body must have known I needed to chill out, because I felt pretty calm most of the time. Comments about my size (extra large) and how I would have such a difficult time if I didn't do insert crazy old wives' tale here mostly just caused annoyance or a good laugh later. 

I think it made a huge difference that I was not the pregnant lady who spent most days complaining about being pregnant, too. I knew I had it pretty good, but I also really just didn't feel that badly most of the time. My migraines went away, I didn't have too much back pain, and my rounding belly was stretching through and disguising my previous poochy tummy. I felt pretty cute, ya'll! Check me out.

Work bathroom mirror selfies were my JAM!

I had a decent work environment that I had planned on going back to as soon as daycare was available (we were wait listed for the one near work, as well as the ones close to our house). It turned out I didn't really need to take off from work prior to my due date, which was June 18, because that day came and went and my OB said I wasn't clocking any dilation or other indications of labor. We did have a very sad month with our older lab, Kierra, because her health had been rapidly declining due to some cancerous tumors that hadn't been discovered until it was too late. With our hearts breaking, we went to the vet for the last time with Kierra about two weeks before I gave birth to Baby A.

Our sweet girl, Kierra

A cake my coworkers made me! They were awesome ladies.

Other than losing Kierra, I felt fine, and kept doing things like taking Tallulah Bear to this park where the dogs could wade in a creek, because she used to love swimming with Kierra and I wanted her to feel so loved in our time of loss. When I look back, though, that wasn't smart because the park has an extremely steep rock hill you have to descend (and then later, ascend) to get to the creek bed, and I was way too pregnant to be doing dangerous rock climbing activity. 

The park where I took Tallulah Bear- see that steep decscent?!!

Me with a very happy Tallulah post-park adventure

Anyway, my OB set my appointment for an induction on the evening of June 24th. I really didn't want to be induced, because I was trying to avoid any medications during my birth. I don't even like getting an IV or blood draw, and I pass out a lot if I'm not well-fed, haha. And my instructions said not to eat... later on, we found out that mean just 12 hours prior to the pitocin administration, so I made Paul get me Noodles and Co. immediately. My mom, sister, and an Army friend of hers were there with Paul and I, and they went back to the house often to check on Tallulah Bear for us. That evening, the nurses started me with the weird paper string they insert [very dryly] that is supposed to help you start labor and dilate, and they told me they'd be back with the pitocin in 12 hours if I hadn't made enough progress. Even though I did feel some cramping and had a tiny amount of dilation around 3am, I hadn't really started any active labor. So by the time 6am rolled around, I'd had a decent amount of rest (although not great, because who sleeps well hooked up to monitors, on your back in a skinny little hospital bed??) and doc made the call on the pitocin. 

My main doctor seemed very excited to be on call during my labor and after the pitocin was pushed into my IV, said he'd be back in a few hours to check on me, and that another doctor would be there if I needed anything- but he clearly didn't expect any movement. Of course, I started some real labor pains after that! He'd made a joke that if he could get me to laugh, I wasn't in enough pain for an epidural. I was trying to move around, but the nurses couldn't get the Bluetooth monitors to work on me and I had to be restricted to my bed with the bands around my belly. After about 4 hours of me laying down in pain, the nurses told me if I wanted an epidural, I'd better get it soon, because my pain would probably ramp up and it'd only be harder, blah blah blah. This was when someone was supposed to remind me to stand my ground on the no-drugs position I'd taken, but no one did, and I just said, "fine, I'll take it, I'm already filled with pitocin at this point!" 

Since Mom and my sister couldn't be in the room during the epidural, they went back home to hang out, Paul held my hands, and I sat up to get needles in my back. It wasn't really that bad, and went pretty quickly. That was around 10:30 am... my main nurse came to check my dilation maybe an hour after that, and popped her head up from in between my legs shouting, "you're already 10 cm! Time to start pushing! Scoot down!" They placed a mirror in front of me so I could watch my progress, and Paul was suddenly calling mom and sis to get back for GO-TIME. Okay, whoa.

My birth team: mom and sis, above, and hubs with me as we were leaving for the hospital!

Around an hour later, at 12:29 in the afternoon on June 25th, Baby A. came FLYING out after only a few pushes. I was kind of disappointed that I'd accepted the epidural when I had been mere hours from delivery, thinking I could have handled the pain, but my mom said that she watched Female Doc stitch me up from Baby A.'s speedy and sideways arrival, and that I should feel glad I didn't have to endure that with only a lidocaine shot. My nurse made a comment to the effect of, "you won't be able to tell your birth story without eye rolls because you had it easy and it was sooo fast!" 

Well, I'm telling it anyway, because that's the process that got me to these moments:

 Thankfully, my sister took a few pictures of the *action* because I was NOT about having my photo taken on purpose during or right after labor (seriously, who looks good after that?!), but I'm glad I have some to remember those absolutely surreal moments. It's already so hard to remember him being so small in my arms, and the way he looks now is so different from the little baby blob we held in those first few days.

Well, I hope you're as much of a blogged birth story junkie as I am! I'm off to look at all my photos and reminisce some more <3

-Big A.